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plank

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be (as) thick as a short plank

To be remarkably stupid, dimwitted, or obtuse. I smoked a lot of marijuana when I was in high school, so I was as thick as a short plank by the time I finally graduated. Jen's new girlfriend is very nice, but she's thick as a short plank.

See also: plank, short, thick

(as) thick as two short planks

Remarkably stupid, dimwitted, or obtuse. I smoked a lot of marijuana when I was in high school, so I turned out thick as two short planks by the time I finally graduated. Jen's new girlfriend is very nice, but she's as thick as two short planks.

See also: plank, short, thick, two

plank over something

to cover something over with planking. The county planked over the old bridge so bicyclists could use it.

See also: plank

*thick as a short plank

 and *thick as two short planks

exceptionally dim-witted. (*Also: as ~.) Dumb? He's as thick as a short plank, more like. Oh, I'd not say she was stupid. As thick as two short planks, yes, but stupid? Never!

See also: plank, short, thick

walk the plank

Fig. to suffer punishment at the hand of someone. (Fig. on the image of pirates making their blindfolded captives die by walking off the end of a plank jutting out over the open sea.) Fred may think he can make the members of my department walk the plank, but we will fight back. Tom thought he could make John walk the plank, but John fought back.

See also: plank, walk

walk the plank

to have to leave your job After he was caught stealing from the company, the treasurer was forced to walk the plank.

Etymology: based on the literal meaning of walk the plank ( to punish someone who worked on a ship by forcing them to walk off the end of a narrow board into the sea)

See also: plank, walk

be as thick as two short planks

  (British informal) also be as thick as shit (British taboo!)

to be very stupid He might be good-looking but he's as thick as two short planks. Most of the people who read these papers are as thick as shit anyway.

See also: plank, short, thick, two

walk the plank

to be forced to leave your job

Usage notes: In the past, people on ships who had committed crimes were forced to walk to the end of a plank (= a long flat piece of wood) and go over the side of the ship into the water.

Several Cabinet Ministers have been forced to walk the plank following the latest Government scandal.

See Take a hike!, stand tall

See also: plank, walk

walk the plank

Be forced to resign, as in We were sure that Ted hadn't left of his own accord; he'd walked the plank. This metaphoric idiom alludes to a form of execution used in the 17th century, mainly by pirates, whereby a victim was forced to walk off the end of a board placed on the edge of the ship's deck and so drown. [Second half of 1800s]

See also: plank, walk

walk the plank

To be forced, as by pirates, to walk off a plank extended over the side of a ship so as to drown.

See also: plank, walk